You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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