this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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