sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
So many bounce houses so little time
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
i think im in europe. pls send help
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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