i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize