well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
