I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
