I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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