I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
