Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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