ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Drake has all the answers
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
