she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
