Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Randomize
