I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
