Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
It all started with a game of naked twister.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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