its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
