PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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