hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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