theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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