what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize