So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
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