we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
