Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Randomize
