break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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