why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
