Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
We're too hungover to prance.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Randomize
