that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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