Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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