we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
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