why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
