She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
