Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
How naked do you want me to be?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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