Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
he high fived his dick after we had sex
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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