I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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