Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Randomize
