K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
