I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
