Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
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