Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
