piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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