just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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