Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize