his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Randomize
