I want to walk on stilts...naked
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
