I swear she didn't look like that last week.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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