i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
