you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
two words...techno handjob
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize