O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
