Well apparently he's into motor boating.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
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