we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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