atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
