Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
