i just made my gag reflex go away.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize