Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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