I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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